There is no me without you

I just finished the most incredible book, There is no me without you. It is a very well written book which provides a glimpse into the AIDS/HIV pandemic and the resulting effects on children orphaned through poverty and death. As stated on the Amazon website "Not unlike the AIDS pandemic itself, the odyssey of Haregewoin Teferra, who took in AIDS orphans, began in small stages and grew to irrevocably transform her life from that of "a nice neighborhood lady" to a figure of fame, infamy and ultimate restoration."

You can visit the author's website, There is no me without you, to learn more about the author and the continued work in Ethiopia.

There were many statements and situations mentioned in the book that brought me to tears. However this one I felt was most appropriate for this blog: "So Haregewoin understood adoption like this: In the Epoch of the HIV/AIDS pandemic, a few families from foreign countries were throwing lifelines to individual children. The life-changing opportunity was not without a price, which the Ethiopian government weighed carefully: the adopted children would lose their country, people, faith, language, culture, and history. A child could end up the sole Ethiopian for hundreds of miles; another, the only child of color in his or her school. But the adopted child would gain the one thing on earth arguably worth more than a homeland: family. While most African nations did not turn to inter-country adoption as an option for orphaned children, Ethiopian officials had decided that for the infinitesimal minority of African orphans who could be raised by foreign parents, the trade-off was worthwhile and they would not block their path."

This statement addresses some of the issues that we initially discussed when thinking about adoption. We can say that we feel so lucky to live in a community where we personally know dozens of families who have adopted from Ethiopia (as well as knowing that there are several dozens of families we have yet to meet). There is an incredibly large and amazing support network for families who have adopted through Ethiopia. We recognize and understand the importance of maintaining her connection to Ethiopia, making this a natural part of our family life. We hope to facilitate this connection through our focus and exposure of her culture through activities, books, music, food, art and eventually returning trips to Ethiopia. We want to raise our daughter to know and love Ethiopia.  

We can't even imagine what the people of Ethiopia are going through. In the book, an adoptive family spoke to the village where their adopted children were born. Given the opportunity to talk with our daughter's family I couldn't have phrased it more perfectly, the family stated "we feel sad for your family's terrible loss. Your tragedy has turned into an incredible gift for our family. We feel deeply honored to adopt these children." We truly feel that our daughter will be a blessing in our life and we feel so grateful to be be given the opportunity to incorporate such a rich and incredible culture into our family. The more we learn about Ethiopia the more we fall in love with this amazing country. This truly is the journey of love.

“Throughout history, it has been the inaction of those who could have acted; the indifference of those who should have known better; the silence of the voice of justice when it mattered most; that has made it possible for evil to triumph.”   Haile Selassie